Chapter Seventeen: Happy Christmas (War is Over)

So this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun

John Lennon, despite getting Christmas and New Year's Eve mixed up, could write some songs. In the battle of best ex-Beatle Christmas anthems, poor Sir Paul could only muster Wonderful Christmas Time. Poor show, Sir Paul.

Christmas is a strange holiday because it sits in the middle. Most holidays, I think, fall into one of two categories.

Some holidays are outstanding when you're a kid You can spend the entire year looking forward to them and when they happen they're the best days of your life. Days like Easter, Groundhog's Day, 4th of July, Arbor Day (who knows why but kids love planting trees), birthdays, and, of course, Christmas.

Other holidays seem unnecessary when you're a kid but you grow to like: Thanksgiving, New Year's Eve, Memorial and Labor Day, MLK Day. Most of these are good because they involve days off from work and heavy eating/drinking.

I can only think of two in the middle: St Patty's and Halloween. It was great to dress in green and pinch the people you liked in elementary school, and it's great as an adult to drink as much Irish Stout as you want. The nature of the holiday has changed, but I think kids and adults like it the same. Substitute booze for candy, and Halloween has the same appeal for all ages--create a clever costume, see your friends, overload on the treat of your choice.

Christmas is definitely more adult friendly than Easter, which becomes mostly useless, but I think it's hard to capture that excitement that children get the night before Christmas. Still, Christmas is great because, no matter your age, you can find something enjoy from it.

Anyway, happy holidays to all who have stopped by. Whatever your reasons for celebrating this year (I always think celebrating Christmas is like celebrating winter, at least in the Northern Hemisphere) I hope you have a merry time of it.

I mentioned last month that I would try to come up with a list of the top 10 movies of this decade. This was a lot harder for me than music--I love music, but I can't go a day without comparing it to some movie or other. And I have shockingly little music aptitude or understanding of the craft, but with movies I at least can approach them with more understanding. I do tend towards a bit of film snobbery, and you won't find some obvious choices on here. The likes of Shrek, Juno, Spiderman, Lord of the Rings, Wall-E, Little Miss Sunshine, Almost Famous, Napoleon Dynamite won't be found here, because I consider them all some form of horrible.. But for fun I've mentioned, where appropriate, the movie that a proper critic would have included instead of my choice.

Honorable mentions: Ghost Dog, The Cuckoo, The Castle, Children of Men, Donnie Darko, Hallam Foe, In Bruges, The Fountain, Coraline, Requiem For a Dream, and Choke.

10. Best in Show
Fans of Waiting for Guffman and This is Spinal Tap were treated to the zenith of the mockumentary, while others were blown away by a simply hilarious movie.
Replaces: Any Judd Apatow comedy.

9. Stardust
This decade was fantastic for the sci-fi genre, and Stardust was, for Neil Gaiman fans, highly anticipated and somewhat overlooked. Amazing scenery, an impressive cast, and a well-written adaptation makes this the representative of the genre.
Replaces: Lord of the Rings.


8. Memento
This movie came out so early in the century that it's hard to remember how incredible it was. The unique structure, however, hasn't been matched since. Nolan of course went on to direct the Batman movies, but the performance he gets here from Guy Pearce is good as anything from Heath Ledger's Malcolm McDowell impersonation.
Replaces: The Dark Knight.

7. Religulous
Bill Maher can come off as a smarmy asshole, but this is one of the few movies that will really important questions. How can a supposedly secular country not bat an eyelash when its president starts a war because "god told him to"? With Larry David directing, though, it's never dull, and perfectly strikes the balance between thought-provoking and entertaining.
Replaces: Fahrenheit 911.


6. Layer Cake
In my opinion, the best British gangster movie of not just the decade but all time. Fans of this film were stoked to see Craig get nominated for Bond; this is one of those immanently quotable re-watchable movies that deserve to be watched by large groups.
Replaces: Snatch


5. Science of Sleep
My favorite of the surreal, mind-blowing films of the decade. Gael Garcia Bernal is slightly off-cast as an unsure Everyman, but he handles it with aplomb. The blurring of reality and fantasy is deftly handled, the supporting cast is great, and Gondry's direction is uniquely brilliant.
Replaces: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

4. Into The Wild
I loved the soundtrack, I loved the movie. It's so hard for a Hollywood production to be truly inspirational, it's amazing when it can actually happen.
Replaces: Broke Back Mountain

3. Shaun of the Dead
This is going to be a controversial statement, but this is hands-down the best rom-zom-com ever made. EVER.
Replaces: Nothing. There's nothing in the same class with it.

2. The Proposition
To me, the greatest western ever made. An amazing cast, a well-written and told story, a superb soundtrack, and a location that oozes off the screen. The advance of dreadful inevitability invokes Euripides and Camus.
Replaces: There Will Be No Country For Old Bloody Men

1. The Fall
Reminiscent of Del Toro or Gilliam at their best, this tale within a tale of a young girl is both highly familiar and unlike anything you've seen before.
Replaces: Pan's Labyrinth.

There you have it. If you haven't seen any of these films, even the Honorable Mentions, consider them to have my highest recommendation. Let me know if you agree/disagree with these choices, your feelings on the Yuletide season, or your Granny's recipes for home-made fudge in the comments please.